|I'm a wee bit late. My birthday was on Thursday. The big 4-0. Whew! It's kind of off-putting to realize that I'm there. Firmly into adulthood. Can't think of myself as a young thirty-something. Grownup. This is the first one that has really hit me.
I'm not sure why, but 30 didn't bother me too much. In this day and age it is still seen as young. You're probably still pushing to establish your career. Heck, a lot of people that age in NYC are still living at home with their parents (I was)or are living with multiple roommates.
Now, at 40, one is expected to have your life all set. You have a significant other, you have kids and the career is, hopefully, going gangbusters.
Well, since I don't have any of those things I'm kind of trying to figure out what to do with myself. I was never interested in a family, but I thought I would know what I wanted by now. I dislike my job - the pay is only adequate, the location sucks and I don't get any satisfaction out of doing it. I always thought that my job would be good if I either really loved it or made tons of money. Well, this one has neither of those things. I also really wish I could live somewhere else besides NYC, but I'm not sure I have the guts to start all over.
I think these feelings are what started me on the weight loss. Not really the desire to be thin, but the need to accomplish something. Anything. I didn't make my goal to be 135 lbs by my birthday, but I'm close. And now I'm getting this niggling little thought...what do I do then?